...ManIA-sTat3..

..n0t in a go0d n wonderful mo0d 2day...

..hence,went 0ut 4 dinner t0day...

...ate a lot tho i was n0t hungry...

...jz in case,ur wondering y im depressed today...

...ans:i dun-the-fucking-know the ans...

~SO,DON'T ASK~

...nway,let's put on some pic of my pleasure-to-my-tummy-but-guilty-to-my-heart-dinner pic...


...mushr00m s0up...

...i dun knw wat's name...basically it's sum chicken with sum mashed potatoes n salad n some spirals...


...jasMine teA...

...n0t verY nice de ice CreaM...


....d mEal c0me wiTh a c0mpLimentaRy beaR...

...tis is d cutest thing i saw today...so adorable..i wished i had them...

....yummilicious mango snow ice...frm 100 yen...

mY piGGie-pIg??

....Last suNday,me N henGlinG dressEd xiao zhu up...hehehe....

....n draGged syn yee al0ng to take pics...

.....kakakaka....

...i was LMAO dat day...

....i loikkeeee.....

....heng ling posing with my piggie_lurve...

...hye ppl....

...omg...xiao zhu is so heavy...hahaha....

syen yee n her muka-tak-puas-hati...hahaha...

~i believe i can FLY~

...r0ck-a-My-tUmmy-oN-thE-trEEt0p...

Menu 4 toniGht: t0mYam stEamb0at...

guesT:Miss Leow n Miss Lee...

Venue:My H0use...

Miss Leow:dun Mess with me while iM eatIng..kakaka....

Miss Leow:dun w0rry...i ll finish eventh0 it TasteD awfUl...

Miss Lee:okie2...come let me hElp u guys for ONCE..hahaha..

whiLe waiTing 4 ouR fo0d to masaK..

hmm...syen yee said gt setapak de feel..hahaha....

nearEr l0ook...:P

syEn y33 help in d c00okingg to0...

me heart holidays....

weeee~~~

it's holiday once more...heee~~

finish my last paper on tuess...then went out with couple of frens..had good food...cute movie...yummy ice cream...pleasant evening spent in bookstore with yee2..lolx...ya...i feel lik a nerd t0o...muahaha...

nextday:went redbox with my dears...hahaha...i went craziiee after the exmm..urmm..lik always..wee~hahaha...my plan to kemas my ro0m failed tremendously cz by d time i went home,i talked with my current-gf til...urmmm...i aso duno wat time...then i teman her to mamak dwnstairs...haha...saw chris there..so,we kinda teman him finish his food..hahaha...(actly,we kinda jz sit there n talk to each other nia..kakaka...pity him)..he must really hate us nw..haha...

wake up early nxtday....n kemas my after-tsunami-conditioned-room....hahaha...seriously...my stuff is everywer...lolx...kemas..n kemas...n kemas...hummm...so tiring~~

mandi n weee~~~~

..head to pudu n ate mcD with my gf...

bought ticket n yay~~home....

reach home at...ummm...dun rmmbr the time...hahaha...

typical day at home:eat,sleep,read "5 ppl u meet in heaven",watch drama,babysit my lil bros..hahaha...bored..but im loving it..heee~~~

i luv my home cz i feel safe ere...u noe...it feels lik ur territory..lik ntg bad wud ever happen to u...wonder whether i wud feel d same in 10 years time...haha...

>,<

opppss...i know ...i know....
jz drop by to wish my frens a gr8t holz and hapy hapy raya....

karma....

dear blog darl,

do u blieve in karma??

I DO...

i do....

i believe dat what comes around,really do goes aound...eventhough it might not happen immediately or in a direct way...but it ll happen sumhow...haizz...treat ppl hw u wnna b treated...dats my motto...i knw dat im no angel but i tried my best to treat ppl fair n square...n tried to love'em...

wat's wrong with ppl nwadys a??they wan ppl to care n concern abt them (evn those small kuchi-muchi stuff) but they wud not evn spend some time to care abt other ppl..do u think dat ur so superior over others dat u hav a greater right to be loved more than other ppl??

i dun thnk so....treat ppl right if u wan them to treat u right....

for instance, evn if ppl think ur pretty n wat-seemed-fragile...n every1 (esply guys) seemed to jz bear with u all this while..bt do u think d whole world hav to obligations to "tahan" u n treat u good????

think twice,darling...cz i love u..n i dun wan myself to really hate u 1 day....mayb i not important 2 u..but u r to me....sorry...no offence...

The E.N.D

It's finally the end of my 1st posting, "Medicine n Society"...

Overall, it's not dat bad...After all, it's well-known as the so-called "honeymoon posting"...
well....It's not all dat sweet actly...kinda lik "dark choc posting"..haha..it's bittersweet...cz there's a lot of reports(i mean TONNES of them) n surveys to do...fun but tiring, filled with arguments (or rather some ppl juz lk to shout at others), laughter (urmm....at least, my gang did~), sunshine (it's really hot there) n rain(at d last week,at last it RAINS)..haha...

ANyway, fUn ALWAYS...i mean ike ALWAYS----> HAVE TO END~

yuppss...it's the end...n im on a holiday now...well, a short2 one...better than none...rite??teehheee~

but my fears are coming BACK to me now...

haiz..ya,u heard it RIGHT~~

THEY ARE BACK...f**K..

hello my lil blog (*,*")

It's been a long tyme since i last update my blog...been kinda busy lately with all the reports and health survey...tiring...

But,it's kinda fun actly...Experienced lotsa first-time here...It's my 1st time fogging...1st time doing health survey door-to-door(and we often been mistaken as d salemen...lol..)...1st time kena gigit nyamuk like nobody's business...hahaha...n lots more...

nway,i "malas" type d...really tired...later have to go Klinik Kesihatan somemore and complete my family case by mon...sad....

ere's some of my recent pic...

my lil room ere in tg karang...


Kompleks Tg Karang...

Me n jia ying...

Summary....

It's been ages since i last update my blog...d last entry is b4 i went to sarawak...i guess...

So,let's start with my sarawak trip...well...it's my 1st time to sarawak...my 1st time flying on a plane...haha...ya..i noe it's kinda pathetic...but...who cares....muahaha...oya...hav to thank my dad 4 sponsoring my air ticket..haha..though it takes a few days to pujuk him...

i was there for couples of days...stayed in nina's house...her parents was very friendly n was really nice to me...we went to lotsa museums,waterfront,cultural village,few shopping malls..
there,i aso tried lotsa new food...hahaha...all sorta stuff-kolok mee,kampua mee,tomato mee,their version of orh jien,sarawak laksa,mee belacan,bidin,cangkuk manis (aka morning glory..haha),seafood....i even tried keropok made from sago grub...oya...not forgetting my TUAK!!!muahaha...i was damn excited to hav this as i always read about this in my textbook dulu..hahaha...

the sarawak museum...i love this...
after havng my tuak...lol...
tuak....diff year...one is sweeter n d other is bitter...
boat ride along the swak river...scary~~
keropok made of sago grubs...taste kinda normal really...

me n nina...in swak cultural village...
lya,nina n me...in MY restaurant...nice food ere...yummy....
nina n her family...really nice ppl...
me n nin...at my nw found bf's hse...lol...

nway...happy time always need to come to an end...haiz...and eventually,it's time to go bek kl n face my fear-clinical years...

On the 13th of May,we registered in KTDI...n due to my malas-ness to fight for merit,i had to stay in Laman Midah...It wasnt dat bad actly n it's actly quite near to hukm...

Frm 14th to 17th,we had an orientation with a fancy name...lol...so-called-Mnggu Mesra Tahun Klinikal...it's supposed to expose us to clinical years...which i think dont really work on me...as i still feel LOST!!haiz...

and then on the 18th,we went to kuala besut's BTN to have our 2nd PPD camp...it was better than my expectation..lol...maybe coz i already noe most of them...so,it's easier to communicate this time...haha...

after the 5-day-camp,we went back to kl...n on the following monday,we started our 1st posting...mine's d Medicine n Society posting...which all my seniors refer as the honeymoon posting...as tis is the most relaxing posting relatively when compared to our other posting...lol...
the 1st week was just lectures...n lectures...n MORE lectures...haha...it's exhausting to have so many lectures in a day...

n the best part is...

my here now in tg karang...


n im still having lectures...

OMG!!

klah...shall stop here...tired typing d..hahaha....

iM dying..

Im suff0cating...

Am I trying to0 hard?? My fren once told me dat the more a person wanna change herself and pushes herself too much,in the end her thoughts would take control of her mind and the reverse effects is gonna happen...is this happening to me??

Im trying very3 hard to change.I wanna change-I NEED to change...I don't wanna live a life with no meaning.I don't wanna be some1 dat ll ruin other ppl's life.Hence, changes is a MUST...

SomebOdy plz help me...Im dying inside..I feel so sad and depressed..Im beginning to hate myself..coz i cant even do something so simple..WHY canT i change my laziness??y musT i proscratinate?God,if you're there,y din u teach me wat to do??

I wanna cry out loud..I wanna lie on somebody's shoulder and cry it ALL out..BUT, im afraid to show ppl the real me..I don't wana be vulnerable..I wanna be strong..I need to be strong...coz i know my daddy put a lot of hope and expectation on me..But, i wanna tell him dat his hope is killing me and strangling me slowly...I cant breathe...but,at the same time,i dont wanna let you down...this is wat u want rite??

Yesterday,somebody asked me-"when are you going to live for yourself and not for anybody else??"..His words really caught me speechless...I don't know what to answer...coz even me dunno when am i gonna stop living for some other ppl...

i NEED to change..

After so many years,i finally think i need a change badly and hoping a new hairstyle would help..would it???